🍴When Julia Meets Motherhood
featuring special guest, Rachel Reinke Nevergall🍴
Happy Summer, friends! This month I’m honored and delighted to introduce you to my friend, Rachel Reinke Nevergall. Rachel and I first met in college twenty years ago, where we sat next to each other week after week in Gamma Phi Beta meetings. Little did we know then that we would one day reunite through Exhale, an online community for creative mamas. Rachel is an incredible storyteller and an overall beautiful person. I am thrilled to share her words with you this month. I hope they inspire and encourage you as they did me!
Do you remember in 2009 when the movie Julie and Julia came out and everyone wanted to start a blog? (I mean, I did, too, but it would take another four years before I got the courage.) For me, it wasn’t Julie I fell in love with. (In fact, I found her kind of obnoxious?) It was Julia who charmed me. (Or was it Meryl? Ok, it was both.) Anytime the movie scene returned to France (or wait, maybe it was France! I digress.) I leaned forward in my seat and a grin stretched across my face like I was listening to my crush. And I was.
I was smitten with Julia. I loved her affinity for food, especially butter. I loved how easily she was delighted. I loved how she loved Paul. And I loved more than anything how she reimagined her life, one recipe at a time. First as a way to learn, then as a way to teach, but mostly as a way to inspire others from the one thing she loves to do: Eat.
(If you need a refresher, watch this scene.)
I was drawn to Julia’s ways like a sizzling pan of butter. I’ve always enjoyed cooking, but watching her approach the kitchen with curiosity, wonder, and bravery inspired me. I wanted to know more about this woman who learned to cook at 36. I lapped up her memoir My Life in France. I poured through her cookbook Mastering the Art of French Cooking. I marveled at how Julia wrote recipes in the same manner in which she learned them–she started with what she knew and took it one practiced step at a time.
One of the first recipes I tried was her infamous Boeuf Bourguignon. I spent an entire afternoon getting every detail right, flipping back and forth between pages as I learned to peel and shape the butter potatoes, not overcrowd the pan of mushrooms, and sear the meat to the perfect caramelized color. We welcomed our dearest foodie friends to our home where I greeted them as Julia Child, complete with pearls and a patch that read L’Ecole Des Trois Gourmandes, printed from the internet, safety pinned to my button down shirt. And then we all sat down to my exaggerated Julia imitation (I’m no Meryl, ok.) “Bon Appetit!”
Now, fast forward 13 years and three children later, walk into my house sometime around 6 PM on any given evening, and you’ll have one question for me: What happened?
Where did Julia go?
Except I won’t be able to answer you because I’ll be too busy calling the kids to the table (ok, fine, yelling) and then responding with any and all other phrases such as: no we’re not having hot dogs for dinner/it’s my job to pick the food and your job to decide if you will eat it/can you please wait until we pray/we don’t talk about poop at the table/milk spilled, again?/you’re eating just apples/bread/ketchup for dinner? Fine.
In absence of my response you’ll look to the table to see what gourmet meal was on the menu for that evening. Chances are you’ll find a variation on a meal we have at least once a week, sometimes more–a platter meal. The same platter used to present the Bourguignon would be on the table but upon it you’d see a random pile of vegetables and protein with some sort of sauce in a bowl. I mean, bourguignon adjacent, I guess, but also not at all the same.
Where’s the curiosity on the table, you’d ask me. Where’s the wonder? Where’s the bravery?
And if I could take a minute from the parenting, I’d say, ok, you’re right. The food is not Julia food. There’s not much craft to this preparation. It’s mostly stuff thrown together on a sheet pan. But Julia is there, if you look closely.
Above all, Julia believed in the love of good food, and the food on my table these days is what my family loves to eat (ok, not the three year old who is a hotdog-etarian. But he’ll get there. Maybe). Not all of it, of course. That’s not the goal, though. The goal is getting to the table. And I’ve learned since becoming a mother that if I want the children to come to the table, I have to make the table a place where they belong. I have to first present at least one food they like, simple ingredients prepared in a way they know and trust. I find broccoli for him, potatoes for her, a bread for everyone. With platter food my family is able to see what delights them and add it to their plate. And when they do I’m like Julia at the table, grinning and sighing at the joy in feeding people you love.
So then, the curiosity, the wonder, the bravery? Where does that come in? That is the part we’re still working on, together. That comes when I have a new sauce, a new vegetable, maybe a plant based protein on the plate for them to try, or not. I’ve learned if I want to show my children how to love food, we have to approach it the way Julia learned to cook–start with what they know and take it one practiced step at a time.
As it turns out, maybe Julia’s Boeuf Bourguignon in all its sexy complicated flavors and slow cooked goodness is not a dish that defines me these days. But Julia’s way to the table, and to your heart, does.
Motherhood has taught me to care far less about perfection and more about connection. I’m a person that adapts to those around her, not out of people-pleasing nature but out of love. I am welcoming when you need consistency, but I am ready to try something new when you are, too. I am just what my family needs around the table and that is exactly who I want to be.
As Julia said in her memoir while reflecting on her first meal in France “In all the years since the succulent meal, I have yet to lose the feelings of wonder and excitement that it inspired in me. I can still almost taste it. And thinking back on it now reminds me that the pleasures of table, and of life, are infinite. Toujours Bon Appetite!”
May the pleasures around your table, and in your life, be infinite, too, friends.
Of course I can not leave you without sharing our very favorite platter and sauce food these days. This one comes from a mash-up of a recipe I saw in Bon Appetit from the amazing Deb Perelman as well as one from Jenny Rosenstrach’s book Weekday Vegetarian.
The Hummus Platter
Start with your favorite hummus recipe. You can use Deb Perelman’s here or Jenny’s here, but any will do, even a store bought version. The key is to thin it out enough with cold water and have the hummus at room temperature so it is smooth and pillowy (is that a word Julia would use?)
Prepare any roasted vegetables your family loves. Seriously, anything will work here. The more variety the better.
Prepare a protein. You could try the spiced version from Deb Perelman’s original recipe. But we have also used meatballs, beans, veggie burgers, sausages, leftover grilled chicken, tofu–again, anything goes.
Prepare, or warm up, naan or thick tortillas. This is my favorite recipe but there’s no shame in the store bought game.
Optional: mix a lightly dressed salad of any combination of lettuce, herbs, tomato, cucumber, onion. I don’t always do this but it’s a nice fresh mediterranean touch to consider.
Place everything on the table and go nuts. I like to add a pillow of hummus on my plate, top it with the “stuff” and use naan to scoop it all up. But my kids always keep it separate, because kids.
Bon Appetite!
This month’s intro was written in response to Ruth Reichl’s writing prompt: What Recipe Defines You? Rachel and I share a love of good food, so when this prompt showed up in our inboxes back in January, we bookmarked it and made a plan.
We’d love for you to share your own response — What recipe defines you?! Hit reply to this email, share in the comments below, or post on your own platform and be sure to tag us! We can’t wait to hear about your favorite recipes.
If you’re feeling adventurous, here’s the recipe for Julia’s Boeuf Bourguignon that Rachel mentioned.
Last week, jam-grade strawberries were on sale at the farm, so of course I bought three flats. We froze a ton for jam and smoothies, but we saved some for this Strawberry Pie and it did not disappoint.
If you read Rachel’s newsletter this month, you know how much I love tacos. This Taco Salad is one of my summer go-to meals, especially on those weeks when we’re bringing home four heads of lettuce and the temperatures are in the 90s.
A few weeks ago, David and I stumbled upon this Sesame Crusted Tuna and it was divine. I highly recommend it for an at-home date night. We paired it with Cucumber Sesame Salad and steamed brown rice.
My friend Colleen published her debut novel, Summer Breakdown, just in time for beach season. My copy came Sunday and I can’t wait to read it while on vacation next week.
When I saw Emily Henry’s new book, Book Lovers, on sale at Target, I had to grab a copy. It’s about two sisters who are taking a month-long vacation together, and I am loving every minute of it.
Chanel Cleeton’s latest novel Our Last Days in Barcelona came out last month and I devoured it in three days. Following the story of Isabel and Beatriz from When We Left Cuba, it’s another fascinating look at international politics in the 1960s.
I’m slowly working my way through Ruth Reichl’s Tender at the Bone. I love Reichl’s way with words, and this book is really helping me claim my own stories of the kitchen.
The long days of summer are perfect for spending hours outside. Here’s a great playlist to keep on repeat when you’re hanging up clothes on your clothesline, soaking up sunshine on the beach, or laying in the hammock in your backyard.
This article really made me think about the stories I long to tell, and how to go about writing them in a positive and healthy way. And this one challenged me and has been weighing heavy on my heart.
My mom got me hooked on The Crown while she was here and now I am all about the Royal Family and Winston Churchill. I love this glimpse of Mary Churchill’s diary.
This is a beautiful collection of children’s books about Civil Rights.
Since we’re talking about recipes this month, these Vintage Cookbooks are worth your time.
To finish up #onedaymay, I shared an I am poem I wrote last year.
I shared a micro-essay about jumping in shadow puddles, spent a weekend at a hotel by myself, and ran my first 5K—with my Mom, who was visiting from Georgia! Coming in at 42:33, it was my second best running time so far. I strained my calf in the process, so now I’m on a healing break, but I’m hoping to run another in the Fall.
My oldest had a dance recital and promised she’d always let me help her with her hair and makeup. For this month’s blog hop with Exhale Creativity, I share what recital day looked like; how I gave myself permission to set aside the chores and write the stories in my head.
I shared my own response to the prompt What recipe defines you? in Rachel’s newsletter this month. Hint: It’s all about tacos, and I promise you don’t want to miss it.
May your summer days be filled with cool drinks, lots of popsicles, grilled veggies, and plenty of time relaxing with friends.
Until next month,
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